I should have started blogging at the beginning of my pregnancy so I could reflect on all the little details later in life. But, that didn't happen. Maybe I'll take time later in this blog to go back and recap the high points during those 37 weeks. For now, its all about how our little snuggle bug made his entrance into the world and the days following. This truly is a story for the books, so sit back and enjoy..
For a couple weeks leading up to his day o' birth, I had been experiencing excruciating sciatic pain. Chiropractor, Advil, stretches..nothing was working and I couldn't walk. I made a visit to my OB's office at 36wks 3 days and after seeing the pain I was in, coupled with previous issues (which, we will discuss in later posts), he gave me the option of being induced two weeks from then- May 1st. My husband and I talked it over and agreed to discuss it again at my next appointment. You see, I had never been keen on the possibility of being induced. I wanted everything au naturel- you know, water breaks (only happens in 15% of women, but I wanted to be in that 15%), labor at home, wait for 5-1-1 contractions, go to the hospital and push out a baby. In my mind, THAT is how snuggle bug would enter the world. Lesson #1 of motherhood: Trying to take complete control of any situation will invariably make things messier.
Fast forward a week: I rolled out of bed for my weekly appointment, where we would now discuss the very real possibility of induction the following week. I hadn't slept well, what pregnant woman does? and was feeling a little "off". I was fighting waves of nausea and overall blah-ness. As I was sitting in the waiting room, my vision started to blur and things got a little swirly. The nurse immediately took me back as my right arm and side of my face started to go numb. My blood pressure had spiked and my sugar had dropped. Insert the waterworks. I don't even know how my doctor understood anything I said through the blabbering of my hysterical, emotional, pregnant self. But, he did and immediately suggested the induction be scheduled that day. WHAAAAAT?! Hold on. We were just supposed to make things more concrete for NEXT week and now I have to decide what to do today while I'm an emotional wreck and don't feel good. As I lay there completely tongue-tied, my doctor voiced how he felt my body had just "had enough" and was sending me not-so-subtle signals. Again, really? I thought our bodies were designed for this whole pregnancy thing? End result: I agreed and headed home to meet my husband and grab the hospital bags. Snuggle bug was about to be on his way.
Upon admission, I was 3cm dilated and 80% effaced so at 2:36pm, the doctor broke my water. At 6:00pm, I was still 3cm/80% and given the option to start Pitocin or I could have another 2 hours to see if I progressed naturally. I. DID. NOT. WANT. PITOCIN. I had heard many
The next however-many minutes are a blur to me as I fought NOT to push with the contractions, which is an incredibly difficult task that I did not do well, as we waited for the doctor to arrive. I think my husband was convinced the nurses were going to have to deliver our little boy and I wasn't so sure myself. Finally the doctor came in and it was go-time! Pushing was not what I expected at all, and I think I even surprised my husband. It went a little like this..
Scream, grunt, push, yell for 10-12 seconds.
-Complete silence for a minute or so-
Me to the doctor: "Ready? I'm going to push again."
Scream, grunt, push, yell for 10-12 seconds.
-Complete silence for another minute-
Me: "Here we go"
Scream, grunt, push, yell for 10-12 seconds.
Scream, grunt, push, yell for 10-12 seconds.
Scream, grunt, push, yell for 10-12 seconds.
And snuggle bug arrived on April 24th at 9:57pm weighing 7lbs 8oz...or so we were told.
Over the next few days, we had a few completely unavoidable scares/issues that only added to momma bear's unhappiness. First, we were told that by the end of the first day he had lost 9% of his body weight and < 10% was cause for alarm. It was the belief of the nurses that he wasn't getting enough through breastfeeding. I fought back and told them I could hear him swallowing and our lactation consultant said he was latching wonderfully, so I wasn't 100% convinced. Not to mention, he was having adequate wet and dirty diapers. Regardless of momma's protests, his nurse came in and discussed supplementing with formula to which I responded by sobbing uncontrollably. All I could think was, "His first 24 hours of life and I'm failing him by not being able to provide what he needs." Talk about a shot to the heart. Needless to say, with every drop of formula I put in his mouth, I cried a little harder.
While battling the supplementing issue, we were hit with jaundice. As common with 2 out of every 3 babies and more common in breastfed babies, snuggle bug had a little too much bilirubin in his system. His nurse measured his level with what looked like a thermometer and after consulting with the doctor, informed us they would need to take some blood to get a more accurate measure because his level was pretty high. He informed us that there was a possibility of additional time in the hospital and the use of photo-therapy to prevent his levels from rising any further. We were told it was important to combat this issue before it could cause learning disabilities..and I blacked out after that. First, he's not gaining weight and now he could have learning problems? How in the world had we gone from complete and total bliss to feeling like our little one was stricken with health problems? As I'd already learned my lesson about control, I gave it all over to the Lord and prayed a solution would be found. Man, was He quick.
Later that evening, the nurse came back in and let us know he had plotted the bilirubin levels incorrectly according to snuggle bug's age and he really wasn't in danger. Cue emotions. We were beyond relieved that he was okay, but I was NOT happy with the incorrect diagnosis. The next morning we were told he was now at a 12% weight loss and it was more important than ever to supplement as he was clearly not getting what he needed. And the flood gates opened. I cried and cried and cried some more. How was this possible? He was nursing like a champ AND I was giving him the formula. Through God's hands, a nurse recognized that such a drastic weight loss was not common and there had to be another issue. I will forever be grateful to her diligence and level of patient care she exhibited. She decided to look back through his chart and noticed his birth weight in grams did not match the lbs/oz conversion. All of the calculations (and what we were told) reflected 7lbs 8oz, but in reality our little one only weighed 7lbs *.*8oz- barely over 7lbs. Courtesy of my doctor's instruction, my husband had taken a picture of snuggle bug as he was on the scale and what do ya know? 7lbs, .8oz Cue emotions, again. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? You've basically been telling me my child is failing to thrive when it was a calculation error on the part of the hospital? When we left, 2 and a half days after he was born, his actual weight loss was 6%. Perfectly normal and healthy.
During all of this chaos and misinformation, we learned that the hospital records reflected a birth time of 9:50pm, when I specifically asked in the delivery room and was told 9:57pm. While that isn't a big deal (we're sticking with 9:57pm, by the way) it was just another reflection of the numerous issues we had during our stay.
Looking down at this sweet face sleeping peacefully on my chest, I quickly forget everything that was "wrong" and can't see anything but perfection. Yes, we had a rough patch. Yes, we were scared. But, we're parent's now, right? That's how things will go from time to time. I thank God every night for this precious little boy and how he's already changed our lives. Never could I have imagined how quickly and selflessly I could love someone. God has truly held our hands and guided us through this pregnancy, delivery, and first week of life. Happy one week birthday, snuggle bug! Mommy and Daddy love you more than you could ever imagine.
"..every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father.." James 1:17
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